I tried out for ‘The Bachelor’ and all I got was this rose and some coconut water

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So that just happened. I attended “The Bachelor” casting call Thursday at Suite.

I can’t say it was my idea, but no one had to twist my arm either. In a way I felt like it my duty to investigate just how one gets selected to find her “true love” — on a TV show — with a predetermined bachelor.

I mean, how does one go from waiting with hundreds of other fantastic and beautiful bachelorettes to being front and center stage in a public competition for “love.” It’s just crazy enough to spur my curiosity. So when my coworker asked me to accompany her daughter, Shellie, to the event I couldn’t turn down an excuse to go.

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I met Shellie right on time at the Epicenter to make our TV debut (or so we thought) at Suite. Upon arriving, I was a little bit let down. There was already a decent number of hopeful romantics awaiting their shot at love. The venue was nothing fancy — no balloons or music, and nothing to do while we waited.

We promptly signed in, signed our lives away and filled out a questionnaire that asked about what we like to do, hobbies or special talents, occupation and past relationships. It also asked about restraining orders (casual) and past felonies.

After filling out the questionnaire we had the luxurious experience of taking what seemed to be a mug shot, extremely up close and personal. (Thank goodness I flossed.) Following the quasi photo shoot we were ushered to play musical chairs until we were seated in the “next up” chair.

Photo from last years open casting call for "The Bachelor."
Photo from last year’s open casting call for “The Bachelor.”

The vibe was mostly quiet and awkward, a mixture of overly confident girls and apprehension, with the occasional small talk and nervous laughter. Eyes wandered about the space, sizing up and judging the “competition.”

Shellie and I sat back and observed the variety of mostly 20-something girls, and their trends and outfit choices. We saw it all. From country concert to semi-formal, skin-tight dresses to baggy high-water dresses, cute rompers to colorful dresses.

We even saw a jean skirt, which I’m pretty sure I haven’t seen since the days of scrunchies and chokers.

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Finally, I found myself in the “next up” chair and was called behind a curtain for my video interview. I donned my microphone and ran through the basics – name, age, occupation, hobbies/interests, kids (where I promptly took the opportunity to brag about my four-legged ones), previous relationships, and, of course, the most important – why I want to be on the show.

I gave some cheesy answer, about how I just want to find my person to do life with, and how I want what my parents/grandparents have found and gotten to enjoy. They make it through the good times and bad because they have each other and it’s the sweetest thing to witness. (Don’t we all want ultimately want that?)

After that, I was told to stand up for a full body scan by the video camera to “capture my height” … sure … how romantic.

The actual interview took about four minutes, and I found myself wondering how they could possibly pick bachelorettes based on only four minutes. Maybe that’s why the serious girls arrived prepared with extra pictures and edited videos of themselves — that’s a whole different level right there. Those girls meant business.

I won’t know if I made it to the next round of interviews until July or August. Either way I was awarded coconut water and a rose for my accomplishment of completing my audition. Bonus, I made a great new girlfriend, all thanks to my coworker.

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As “Sex and The City” says: “Maybe our girlfriends are our soul mates and guys are just people to have fun with.” You be the judge.

Photos: Ashley Shapiro; David T. Foster/Charlotte Observer

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